
One of my daughter’s friends gave me the highest compliment a few months ago.
We were having coffee, and he looked at me and said, “Mama T, I love that you’re actually here. You’re always so present.”
And that’s when it hit me: every time I resist the urge to pick up my phone, to check out, to abandon this moment – I’m saying something powerful, not only to those I love, but to myself:
This moment deserves my full attention.
I work hard to be a woman who’s present. Present when I’m working. Present when I’m eating. Present when I’m with Fonz.
I want to be fully awake in my life.
But I said “work hard” for a reason. Because it’s not easy.
Everything, it seems, tries to distract me from this moment.
I’ve given in to the urge to scroll instead of create. I’ve picked up my phone while Fonz is talking. I’ve watched a show with my mind already on tomorrow.
And those moments? They feel empty. Because I wasn’t fully living them.
Here’s what I’ve learned: women don’t have a time problem. They have an attention problem.
We live in the age of distraction. Corporations are literally capitalizing on stealing your attention.
But when you decide to embrace elegance as a way of life, you must manage where you place your attention.
My most elegant days come down to five specific choices I make consciously. Presence is at the heart of all of them.
In this week’s episode, I break them down.
Choice #5? This is the one that will change everything when you practice it.
Cheers to more elegant days,

P.S. Distraction is costing you more than time. It’s costing you moments with the people you love, your ability to hear your own voice, and the creative energy to actually build the life you want rather than consume everyone else’s.
In February, we’re dedicating the entire month in the membership to The Undistracted Life.
I’ll teach you my “Life Menu” concept, which has helped me create a life beyond my wildest dreams. Join us here.
My attention is a love letter to the present.
What I choose to notice expands.
When I’m fully here, life reveals its beauty.
Elegance begins in awareness.

Jonathan Alder Eden Backgammon Set
Every morning, I play at least one round of backgammon. Coffee in hand. Light streaming in through my sitting room windows. It’s my version of meditation.
The clack of the dice, the rhythm of the moves – it all brings me back to the moment. And this Jonathan Adler set? It’s a piece of art.
Designed with bold graphics and a touch of whimsy, it’s proof that daily rituals can be both playful and refined.
Because elegance isn’t reserved for special occasions – it’s something you practice every day.
An Elegant Day Comes Down to These 5 Choices
The other morning, I told Fonz, “You hear this Miles Davis? This is how I want my life to feel.”
That morning jazz feeling – calm, confident, unhurried – isn’t luck.
So why do some days feel elegant and aligned… while others feel scattered and rushed?
In this episode, I explore what truly creates that feeling of ease and grace – one intentional choice at a time.
// TheEDIT
A weekly digital magazine by the School of Self-Image



