Like the air you breathe, abundance in ALL things is available to you. Your life will simply be as good as you allow it to be!
This past week has been extremely humbling and overwhelming in the best of ways. I did my weekly stop at the post office expecting to pick up bills and junk mail only to find gifts from readers and clients — chocolates, lipstick, a beautiful pen, a Paris journal, aromatherapy and a luxurious Henri Bendel candle (the School of Self-image community has amazing taste).
When I returned home, there was a package by my door — a beautifully crafted gold pendant of Paris from one of my dearest friends.
That night, I went to my dearest friend’s, Lisa, home for my birthday party. She is truly the most amazing hostess (right alongside my mother) that I have ever known.
A gorgeous birthday cake was lit with candles and an entourage of my dearest friends singing, “Happy Birthday.”
Then, every single person at the party (including my daughter) showered me with love with statements of what they appreciated about me.
Then there were more presents — a French cookbook, a luxurious flower arrangement, earrings from Paris, a St. Germain Cocktail recipe book, chic red gloves, an original canvas print of Italy shot by my dear friend, a closet organizer and a sequined black bra top. Clearly, I have the best friends in the world!
If that wasn’t enough, mon chéri and dear friends whisked me off to Telluride for a weekend of ski and play.
Oh, and my mother sent me a beautiful silver plated dish. Simply stunning.
All of this for me.
Sounds fabulous, right?
It’s everything I’ve ever desired — friends, abundance, love, celebration.
Yet, with each present and act of kindness, I felt a bit uncomfortable.
I love showering others with gifts, encouraging words and love. But, when it came to receiving all this attention and love last week, I started to wonder, “How much can I handle?”
When you ask for something, you must also ask for the courage to receive it. (tweet it)
And, therein lies the most amazing revelation of my birthday week. School of Self-image is about expanding your capacity for more — more joy, love, beauty, abundance, passion, excitement, and the goodness of life.
Sadly, many women have increased their capacity to handle all the wrong things — more fear than peace, more scarcity than abundance, more self-hatred than self-adoration, more doubt than confidence, and more pain than joy.
When I was sitting at that table during my birthday dinner hearing the beautiful sentiments from family and friends, I heard my wise 90-year old self whisper:
Darling, you asked for all of this. Don’t push it away. Take it like a lady!
So, let me ask you: How fabulous are you willing to let your life be?
Sure, it may be uncomfortable, but are you willing to get more comfortable with more?
Here’s what I know to be true: there is SO much in life that wants to flow to you. But, you gotta open up, breathe and let it in!
As my wiser self says, “Take it like lady.”
If you’re willing to accept the challenge, share with me by answering this question in the comments below:
What do you desire to handle more of in your life?
With a Grateful Heart,
The Self-Image Manifesto
You’re Invited To Live An Extraordinary Life!
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I want to be able to dream bigger. I've lived in a world of making my kids' dreams come true, and to do that I shrunk the size of my own dreams until they're barely recognizable. I want my dreams to grow to the point where they lift me to exciting new heights.
Patty, I hear you. I've been in a place where my dreams felt so small compared to what I knew I was capable of. I've also been in that place where I had no idea what I wanted.
I suggest that you begin to 'play' with possibility. If you could achieve one thing in the next 6 months, what would it be?
What I've discovered is that fulfilling those smaller desires lead to bigger ones.
xoxo,
Tonya
Take it like a lady!...love it! I desire more beauty, ease, passion, abundance, energy, travel, love, connection, inspiration, health, excitement, adventure, determination, hustle, and peace! I am opening my heart to it all. Thanks, Tonya! So glad you had a wonderful birthday full of celebration and love!
Andrea, you sound like such a positive, lovely person -- full of hope! I wish you well on your journey.
Thank you Andrea!
And, I'm going to hold the intention that MORE of all of that flows to you.
Happy Belated! The statement that hit home the most to me was the realization that many women have "increased their capacity to handle all the wrong things." I know I have, from unfounded judgments to unfair workplace practices. I no longer feel guilty about standing up for myself and making waves -- and I reap the benefits as well, both personally and professionally. Life is far too short!
Thank you Mei! And, yes it is.
You're right, Tonya, it can take courage to receive what we asked for. Perhaps the challenge is that many of us doubt that we deserve amazing things in life, especially love. This is a very timely question for me now, what do I want to handle more of in my life? I want to handle more calm (less stress), more moments of joy and laughter and being fully present to really appreciate them. I could definitely handle some more dollars in my bank account too. A few more of my favourite luxury raspberry chocolates couldn't hurt either.
Emily, I've trained myself to doubt the doubt. Try it.
And, raspberry chocolates are always a good thing, IMO!
T
I desire to accept myself for who I am and have grace enough to accept my family and friends for who they are. I also desire to really celebrate my 50th birthday this year with ease and elegance. So happy to be part of the French Kiss Life Club! Only a few days in and I already feel the shift in my spirit and my soul! Thank you and a belated Joyeux Anniversaire to you!
What an incredible year you're going to have Maureen!
And, welcome to the FKL Club — such a fabulous group of women, eh?
I love this - "Darling, you asked for all of this. Don’t push it away. Take it like a lady!" I struggle with receiving and allowing others to do for me out of guilt I guess. 'Why do I deserve this?' comes to mind. It is an unfortunate habit to accept that mindset. The abundance of the universe is not limited for anyone who receives as well as gives. Thank you for the reminder and for living by example. <3
You are SO welcome Natalie!
And, I challenge you to turn that question around and train your mind to ask: Who am I not to deserve this?"
It's a practice.
Wow, this really hits home. I am usually the one in the background making sure everything runs smoothly and letting someone else take the spotlight. I am almost always uncomfortable with individual praise or gifts. There is something in me that says "Someone else needs this more than you" and I struggle with the line between deserving and being greedy. Sometimes I even apologize when someone compliments my outfit or style and feel the need to tell them that the outfit is old or that I bought it on sale. I have spent my life trying to ride that middle line of having my own style but not making others feel uncomfortable about theirs and I am tired of it I want to French Kiss Life and feel good about my choices and style. For 2015 my mantra is "Be a Candle". The quote is"Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle and the life of the candle will not be shortened..Happiness never decreases from being shared" Budda
Trying hard to not dim my shine this year.
Elaine, I struggle in a similar way. I feel very uncomfortable with the attention on me. I even try to spend my birthday alone because of it! I love your quote, and will join you your journey, and try not to dim my shine!
FKL has really started to change my perspective, Tonya, thank you so much for starting this movement, you really are changing lives.
Love to all, and cheering you on 🙂
I want to accept a compliment with grace and without justifying or minimizing myself.
I struggle in a similar way, because I always, without fail, put myself down in a small way. I will say that I got something on sale, or say I got it for free, or point out that I got it at the Salvation Army. I say it not because I get fabulous deals and I want to show that off, but because the attention embarrasses me. I'm working on it! Tonya is helping...
I desire to handle more of the love, attention, and care of a new man and let go of the fear of not getting what I want from my last relationship.
I desire to handle more financial abundance and prosperity in my life.
I desire to handle more of a first-class community in my life!
I desire to handle more international travel and a few luxurious items in my life!
Megan, oh yes to all! I completely agree. Very insightful, and an excellent list to #frenchkisslife!
It's a week for revelations, Tonya! I have unpacked some long overdue baggage myself. I have had the capacity to handle emotional indebtedness for about 10 years but unpacked that this week. So, I'm taking it like a lady and getting some new #FrenchKissLife luggage. It feels elegant and light! For now it's all metaphorical yet I know better. I *know* it's going to manifest in a bigger, beautiful, and better way in my life <3
Hello Tonya, I am so happy to have joined your Club from Italy. My biggest dream is to allow myself to follow my true passion writing fashion novels and to find the courage to quit my boring job.
You are really changing my way of thinking in the best way, thank you very much!
Celeste
Wow! Time to think about what more I wish in my life! I look around and think, at first, that I have everything I ever wanted and I have been blessed to travel to almost everywhere I ever wanted to go...I have a beautiful home with a fantastic yard, drive a Lincoln Navigator, I am raising my 11 yo grandson, I have a loving husband...what is missing? More joy, more abundance, certainly better health or at the least sustained good health, healthy weight loss of 70lbs., a new wardrobe to match the weight loss, ah more PASSION is what I truly want both from within and from without. I have been living a very safe life but not the passion of my youth...somewhere along this 70 years I have lost it. The FKL style is already helping me to even recognize the loss and to start to reawaken PASSION within me. Thank you, Tonya for this enlightenment! I am blessed.
Kippy, you sound like you have so much already! If you ever want to work on your wardrobe, I am always happy to help. I shop vicariously!
Thank you, Mei. I could use the help. I rarely shop for myself any more. I need to work on increasing the amount of my personal spending money. I was thinking about going to Macy's. I need to finish going through the clothes I already own first. Hope to finish next week.
Yes, I would be happy to help you! You can find me on Twitter, and we can message, too. I am great at bargains -- Ebates, Swagbucks, eBay, Etsy, you name it.
I wish I had more close friends nearby. I've moved around a lot and all my best friends live far away. I'd like to make new friends here, but I don't know how. I'm extremely, painfully shy, and I don't live the same (more carefree, more youthful) lifestyle that I used to. Sigh.
Serena, I know how you feel. I live far away from my friends, and I am always trying to get people together and make new friends. It is very difficult! Keep your head up. Maybe you will find someone here who lives nearby. I found some Miamians who are part of the #frenchkisslife club!
Wow how neat! I'd love to go to Miami sometime. I live in Spain though. Similar weather to Miami, different culture haha!
Serena, I have had luck with making friends through other people. Sometimes I go out with a work friend and meet their friends, and then I become part of the group!
My man and I have lived apart for over 8 years now. I have asked the Universe that by Feb 28/15 we will be living together full-time finally. I ask for the courage and open heart to finally make a home together and be able to blend out lives permanently. Bisou.