How to be a Vibrant Woman

Anyone can be a vibrant woman if she chooses to be. 

There are a few things I’ve noticed about women who are vibrant ... 

Have you ever been in a room full of people and observed a vibrant woman? You may have found yourself a little bit in awe of her. 

You find yourself wondering - How did she get to be so charismatic? 

We’ve all seen her because she is everywhere. 

She is that woman who walks in and just lights up the room. She is attentive to others and others are drawn to her. Everything about her seems to sparkle and shine. She’s high-energy, positive, gracious, and vivacious. 

A vibrant woman is enthusiastic and full of life. We can’t help but feel uplifted by just being around her. 

The interesting thing about her, though, is that her vibrancy has nothing to do with her physical looks. 

I mean, yes, she is dressed elegantly and appropriately for the occasion, she is put together and she takes care of herself; but it’s not a physical thing that makes her vibrant. 

It’s an energetic thing. It’s something that she exudes. It’s something that radiates from within her. 

Being the most vibrant woman in the room is an inside job. 

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately as I’ve been working with so many beautiful women in the School of Self-image. 

Over the years, I’ve noticed certain things about the women I see as vibrant. Here are three vibrancy characteristics that I see in those women who have that “it factor.”

A vibrant woman is a self-aware woman.

Self-awareness is something that we can all benefit from, and it’s something that every vibrant woman I know has got down pat. 

Self-awareness is at the core of a vibrant character, enabling every vibrant woman to navigate life with a sense of purpose, authenticity, openness, and trust. 

Being self-aware lends an explanation to her success and to her failures.  

By having a better understanding of who she is, the most vibrant women are able to better themselves in the areas where growth is needed. 

A vibrant woman is deeply knowledgeable about herself and committed to her own personal development.

But how does she become self-aware? 

• She journals every day, writing down her goals, her dreams, her gratitude lists, her frustrations, and her triumphs. 
• She meditates and grows in the area of mindfulness.
• She practices the art of self-talk, paying attention to the questions she asks herself and the answers she gives. 
• She pays attention to her thoughts, understanding that her thoughts become her feelings and her feelings become her reality. 
• She takes psychometric tests, which are a standard and scientific method used to measure a person’s mental capabilities and behavioral style. Two well-known psychometric personality tests include the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the Enneagram test.
• She talks to close friends or family members and asks for honest feedback. 
• She works with a life coach or joins a coaching collective such as the School of Self-Image. 

A vibrant woman is empathetic and kind but she also sets gracious boundaries.

Empathy is the identification of the thoughts, feelings, or emotional state of another person. 

By being empathetic, we’re able to be kind to others by tuning into what they're experiencing and what they need.

Being in tune with the needs of others, however, doesn’t make the vibrant woman give more than she is emotionally, physically, or circumstantially capable of. She sets firm but loving boundaries, understanding that she plays a part in the toxicity of others when she fails to set limits. 

The powerful vibrant woman understands that while kindness and empathy will take her further in life than any other human characteristic, she must care for herself first. 

A Vibrant woman is unapologetically authentic.  

Being unapologetically authentic starts with self-awareness and self-acceptance first and foremost. After all, how can you be authentic if you don’t know yourself? 

More importantly, how can you be a vibrant, authentic woman if you don’t like yourself?

Many of us are continually juggling inner and outer aspects of ourselves in order to better fit in, to become more successful, or to find connections with others.

As little girls, we were guided by society, our families, our religious leaders, our teachers, and our peers to think or act in certain ways. As a result, we began to prioritize fitting in; this is sometimes referred to as the “adaptive self.” 

The “adaptive self” is not without value. It helps us navigate a polite society; to live and behave like civilized human beings. However, it sometimes does not allow for our authentic self to shine through. 

As women in a society that is now far more connected because of technology, the challenge has become even greater. Today we are bombarded with media and “social influencers”  that tell us how to look, act, think, and what we should strive for in life. 

There are a number of ways that you can develop authenticity despite societal pressures to be someone else. 

• Self-observation is an important key to developing authenticity. Practice observing how you act in certain situations and how your behavior coincides with your inner self.  Notice which responses to the world around you feel true and which do not resonate with your inner thoughts and feelings. 
• Look closely at your belief systems and consider where they came from and if they feel right for you today. Be fearless in confronting them and changing them if they don’t feel good. 
• Pay attention to discrepancies between your actions and your beliefs. If you catch yourself being judgmental of others or making disparaging comments that are racist, ageist, sexist, or classist, ask yourself why and examine the belief system that those actions may have stemmed from. Sometimes we say and do things that were ingrained in us during our childhood even when, in fact, they are inconsistent with who we really are and what we believe in today. If you embrace what is true for you today, and act accordingly, you can better show up vibrantly and with authenticity.  

An inside job, becoming a vibrant woman is as simple as transforming your self-image.

Remember, My Friend, your self-image shapes who you are; it shapes your entire life. 

If you’re feeling bored, overwhelmed, stuck, and uninspired and are ready for the extraordinary life you’ve been dreaming of, there’s a way:

Simply say yes to the extraordinary today and enroll in the School of Self-Image.