5 Signs You're Ready for a Style Renaissance

Have you ever felt like your wardrobe was holding you back instead of propelling you forward? Are you ready to transform not just your style, but maybe your entire approach to life? Well, in today's episode, we're going to explore why now might be the perfect time for your style renaissance and how The Style Experience can be your guide on this transformative journey. So let's dive in.

Welcome to the School of Self-Image, where personal development meets style. Here's your hostess, master life coach, Tonya Leigh.

Hello my friends. Welcome back to another episode of the podcast. I am so excited and the reason why I am so excited today is that the doors to The Style Experience just opened. This is an experience. I don't even like to call it a course or a program. It really is an experience that I ran for the first time last year and the results were so extraordinary, I am so looking forward to doing it again. I only do it once a year and I put a lot of my time and effort into the women who go through this experience. I get to know them. We bond, we grow, we learn together and it's starting on October the 3rd, hence why I am so excited.

And I'm going to tell you more about this program in a minute, but I do want to just give you a little idea of why I created The Style Experience because for many years, I like many women, was so confused by style. I knew deep down I wanted to be a stylish woman, but I didn't know how. And so my answer was to buy a lot of clothes and hoped it worked out, to imitate or at least attempt to imitate what I saw in magazines and on celebrities. I really took an outside in approach to style, meaning I hope I can figure out on the outside so it affects how I feel on the inside.

And that just never worked. It never answered the deeper questions that come with a style journey, which is who are you really? What do you value? What do you love? What turns you on? What excites you? What do you want to build your life around? And it was only when I started doing this deeper work around my self-image, did my style begin to evolve in a change so that it really felt aligned with who I am.

And it just so happened that I was by default sharing this stuff with friends and even with clients within the School of Self-Image, and before that French Kiss Life, which was my previous brand. And I noticed that it was working. That I was seeing exponential results with clients around their style by doing this deeper work. And so after years of women asking me, Tonya, I really wish you would do a style focused program, last year I decided to do it for the first time. And again, it was so much fun. It was life changing and we are taking it to a whole new level this year because anytime you do something, you learn and you grow and you just take those lessons and apply it over and over. And I will probably be doing that for the rest of my life in all of my programs and in my life itself. But this year we are up leveling the entire style experience and I'm just so excited to work with the women who choose to be a part.

Because style is one of the most powerful personal development tools. It will show you things about yourself. It can up level you in ways that you couldn't do on your own. And sometimes women want to argue with me that style doesn't really matter. But what I say with them is that everything is style. How you carry yourself, how you sign your name, how you walk into a room. And yes, the clothes you wear are all a part of your style and we want to tell that story on purpose and that is what we do in The Style Experience.

Yes, you will learn timeless style principles and how to style your outfits, advanced styling techniques. We will talk about all of that. But when you pair that with the inner work of really discovering what your true essence is, that's when the magic happens. So in preparing for The Style Experience, I've been thinking a lot about who this experience is for and who it's not for because it's not for everyone. There are certain people who even if you want to work on your style, it's not going to be a good fit because this work goes deep. If you're just wanting to learn about colors and places to shop, then yeah, you will learn a lot about that within The Style Experience. But we do take it to a deeper level.

And so I was thinking about what this work is all about and it really is about a style renaissance. I mean if you think about what renaissance means, it is a period of rebirth and renewed interest in art and culture and learning. A style renaissance is a personal awakening, a rejuvenation, a rebirth of who you are in relationship to style. Like how do you express that through your fashion choices and self-expression through your clothing? It's not just about buying new clothes or following trends. A style renaissance is about rediscovering yourself, embracing change and using style as a tool to express your evolving identity.

I think that this work really is about you coming back home to yourself and sometimes you've been so far away from home that you don't even remember it. Or in this case remember her, but she's still there and that's what I'm passionate about. Helping you rediscover who are you before the world told you who you should be? Who are you at your very core? This is not about becoming someone you're not. It's about becoming who you always have been, but maybe you've lost touch with her.

And so I want to give you five signs that you are ready for a style renaissance. You ready? In doing this work for many years now, one of the biggest signs, we're going to call this sign number one, is you are in a major life transition. Maybe you're going through a career change, you're switching industries, you got a promotion or you're starting your own business. Or maybe it's personal milestones. Maybe you're entering into a new decade of life. You're getting married, you're becoming a parent, or maybe you're getting divorced. Maybe you're going through physical changes. Maybe you've gone through significant weight loss or gain or you're adapting to a new health condition. These are all major life transitions and when your life shifts dramatically, often there is this feeling, even if it's a positive shift, it's like a death. It's like you're letting go of who you've been and you're stepping into a new version of yourself.

And so along with that, your style needs to evolve to this new version of you. Your clothes are not just fabric. They are an expression of who you are and where you're going in life. And so if you find yourself in this new territory, personally or professionally, it's a clear sign that your wardrobe might need a renaissance to match this new identity, this new self-image. So that is sign number one.

Sign number two is where some of you may be right now. I've definitely been there, all of my friends have been there, my clients have all been there. At some point, we all find ourselves here. I've never met a person who hasn't been in a rut and that is sign number two. You are in a rut. You are going through the motions. You're thinking the same thoughts, doing the same things, hanging out with the same people, having the same conversations, driving the same ways to work, eating the same things. You just feel like you are in a rut and you're also probably wearing the same outfits on repeat week after week. Shopping may feel pointless because everything looks the same. You can't remember the last time you felt excited about getting dressed or maybe about your life in general.

A life rut can be resurrected or overcome by up leveling your style. And here's why. It creates this cognitive dissonance and within that dissonance, you get to choose. So let me give you an example. Let's say you've been in a rut of just feeling really down and you've been choosing outfits that represent that feeling state. Well, the moment you're like, you know what? Today is the day that I'm going to do the hard thing and I'm actually going to put on an outfit that looks great on me. Even though your brain's telling you why bother, you shouldn't do it, you are fighting for who you want to be. You're fighting for how you want to feel. And so you put that outfit on and you walk by a mirror and you see yourself. Now you can see there's a dissonance between your feeling state and your physical appearance.

And in that moment you get to choose. Do you want to move towards the state that you imagine that great outfit represents? Or do you want to stay where you are? And you do that day in and day out and you literally climb your way out of a life rut through clothing. I have done it so many times, my friends. So many days I didn't feel like getting dressed. So many days I wanted to just put on the sweats and call it a day because my brain was trying to convince me that there's no hope. There's no reason. It doesn't really matter. You've got too far to go. You fell too badly. It's not going to work.

But I did it anyway because there was a part of me that knew deep down like a little flicker inside me that was saying, keep going. Do it. Dress up. You matter. It's worth it. It does matter. There is hope. And by doing that, I have climbed out of so many life ruts. Clothes can change your life and so if you find yourself being in a style rut or a life rut, I want to challenge you that you are ready for a style renaissance.

Sign number three is this, getting dressed is a chore. When the act of choosing an outfit feels more like a tedious task than an enjoyable part of your day, it is a sign that you are ready for a style renaissance. You might be experiencing this if you find yourself dreading the morning routine of picking out your clothes. I'm raising my hand because I've definitely been there. You're like, ugh, I've got to go to work. I got to go meet some friends. I got to pick out an outfit. And it feels like it's just a dreadful task. It's not something you look forward to. It's not full of joy, which getting dressed should be.

I'll never forget a French woman telling me the three things you do every single day is you eat, you live in your home and you get dressed. And so when you think about it that way, the one thing that you're going to be doing every day for the rest of your life, if you're not finding joy in it, there is a problem. And I remember vividly when she said that, a light bulb went off. I was like, oh my god, she's so right. These are the three things that we do every day and I set out to master them, which is why I went on my own style journey. I was so tired of feeling like I was out of alignment with what I felt like who I was on the inside and it not matching up with my outer appearance. I was so tired of all the drama of getting dressed. I was tired of saying no to events because I was afraid I didn't have anything to wear. I wouldn't fit in. I was like this is the one thing that I'm going to be doing every day for the rest of my life. So I want to master it.

And that's one of the reasons why I created The Style Experience because it's the one thing that you do every day. I want you to do it confidently and joyfully, and you can only do that if you know who you are. Like who you truly are and you understand style principles to help you express that version of yourself. Also, if you've noticed part of getting dressed being a chore, you'll know you're experiencing this if you've stopped putting an effort into your appearance just because it feels pointless and you settle for the whatever is clean rather than what truly excites you. Getting dressed is a form of self-care and self-expression. It shouldn't be a burden. If it's become a chore, it's time to rediscover the joy and curating your style. A style renaissance really can transform this daily task, this thing you do every single day, from drudgery to delight and that I am so excited for.

Okay, sign number four that you're ready for a style renaissance is you find yourself envious of other women's style. Now let's just have an open, honest conversation, because I've been there. I've been perusing magazines or on Instagram or seeing a friend show up and being like, gosh, I envy her. I wish I had what she had. I wish I had that outfit. I wish I looked as good as she does. And envy to me is just a sign of desire. It's actually not a bad thing if you use it for its purposes, which is to showcase to yourself something that you want for yourself and for whatever reason you don't think you can have it. And I'm here to tell you that you absolutely can.

Instead of feeling discouraged by this envy, I want you to use it as motivation. I want you to start asking yourself things like what is it about their style that I admire? Is it the bold use of colors or the mix of textures or patterns or perhaps the confidence with which certain styles are worn? Identify these aspects and consider how you can incorporate them into your own wardrobe. Use your envy as fuel for your own style renaissance.

And then finally, sign number five that you are ready for a style renaissance is this, you've hit an upper limit. This happened to me last year actually. I felt like I had hit an upper limit. I've also called this being out of my sweet spot. And usually when this happens, we immediately could go to mindset work. Which it's all mindset, don't get me wrong. And I also believe that we can engineer our environment as well as our style to help us access new possibilities, new ways of thinking, creativity that will allow us to overcome these upper limits.

And that's exactly what I did. I went straight to my closet. I'm like, listen, what needs to go? What represents the old me? What represents the old energy? And then what do I need to bring in? What represents where I'm going? And I literally crawled out of my hole. I overcame an upper limit with style as one of the major tools in doing so. I want you to think about all of the upper limits that you may be facing. Maybe it's a financial ceiling. You've been earning the same salary for years despite your best efforts. Maybe your business revenue has plateaued at six figures annually and you just can't seem to break through to the next level. Maybe it's career stagnation. You've been in the same position for five years and your request for promotions just keep getting denied. You're doing the work of a manager, but you still have your old title and your old pay grade and you're like, what is going on? Why can't I get over this hump?

Maybe it's a relationship upper limit. You and your partner have been dating for seven years, but it just doesn't feel like the relationship is progressing. And you're ready for the next step, but you're stuck in this holding pattern. Maybe it's a upper limit with your fitness. Maybe you've been trying to lose those same 15 pounds for months, but the scale just won't budge. Your workout routine may be boring. It used to give you results, but now it's not doing anything and you're not excited about it.

Maybe it's a creative block. Maybe you're a writer who used to publish a new story every month, but you haven't written anything for over a year and your creativity feels completely tapped out. Maybe it's a social circle upper limit. You've had the same friends for a decade and while you love them deeply, you feel isolated from new perspectives and experiences and you want to expand your social circle. These are very typical upper limits and they can be very frustrating and demoralizing actually, unless you develop the skill of overcoming them.

Because you know you're capable of more, right? You know it, and that's why it's so demoralizing because you're like I know I am capable of more. I know there is more within me, but I just feel stuck right now. Well, this is actually where a style renaissance can come into play as a powerful tool for change. You can get a confidence boost, when you're dressing for the job you want, not the one you have, you can feel that energy coming from your clothing. There is a term called clothes cognition that they've actually studied. How clothing affects our cognition and it's a real thing. A new look can give you new perspectives. When you change how you look, you open doors to new social circles or professional opportunities.

A style renaissance can also help you break patterns. If you've been wearing the same outfit for years, changing up your style can actually shift your energy in a very powerful way. It is a pattern interrupt that forces your brain to think in new ways. When you walk by a mirror and you see yourself in a new way, you are then asked which version of you are you going to believe in? Are you going to stay in the version that you've been or are you going to reach and stretch into that version that you are stepping into?

Let's also talk about the creative inspiration. Experimenting with different artistic styles has the ability to spark creativity in other areas like your writing, for example. And then as it relates to relationships, if you feel stuck in a relationship, changing up your style shifts your energy. And that's why I love style so much. Style is more than just fabric on your body. It is a form of self-expression. It's also a tool that can force your brain to think in new ways. It can shift your energetic state.

And so think about it this way. You and your partner have been together for seven years. Maybe you notice that you're wearing the same things and feeling the same ways and nothing ever shifts. The energy just keeps going in the same direction over and over again. But the moment you switch up your look, the moment you wear something that truly feels like you and you walk into that room with him or her and you are feeling confident, maybe you're feeling sexy, maybe you're feeling more feminine, more romantic, that has an effect on the energy in that room and in the energy of that relationship. But more than anything, you start to feel better. And when you start to feel better, you show up in more powerful ways. You start to have more clarity on your next steps. And so if you have hit an upper limit, it may be time for a style renaissance.

If you can relate to any of these, then I want to invite you to join us for The Style Experience. Again, I only run this program one time a year. I put a lot of my time and effort into supporting the women who choose to be a part of this experience. And we have intentionally created it to be rolled out over the course of six months because Rome wasn't built in a day and neither is a great wardrobe. We are going to go deep. We are going to explore. We are going to have a lot of self-discovery. We are going to have fun and each month builds on the next.

This isn't just about shopping and learning style principles, although that is a big part of The Style Experience. This is about figuring out who you really are, what you really love, what you deeply value, what your goals, your aspirations, what it is that you want for your life and aligning your style choices with that. This is about no longer waiting, no longer waiting until one day when. One day when you've lost the weight or you're making more money or you're more organized or you're settled in your new house. This is you saying to yourself, now is the time. Now is the time for me to do this work. Now is the time for me to step into that version of myself that I know deep down that I really am.

Because there will never be a perfect time. Can we all agree on that? Life will always tell you later. You can do it next year. You can do it next month. You have more important things to do right now. And for some of you, that may be a very conscious and intentional choice that feels really good for you, and I applaud you on that. But for a lot of you, if you pay attention, you'll notice that this is the theme of your life. You're always waiting. You're always waiting until one day when you have all the answers. One day when you feel ready. One day when everything is perfect. And have you noticed that that day never comes? It's a fallacy. It's a myth. It doesn't exist.

And so for the woman who's ready to stop waiting until one day when, you're going to love The Style Experience. Again, we've intentionally rolled it out over six months because I know that we have a lot on our plates. I know that we have obligations and things to do, and yet I don't want you to put this part of your on hold another day if this is work that you are being called to do.

In The Style Experience, we don't wait until we have the perfect body because we know that the body we have right now is deserving of love and respect, and we dress her accordingly. We don't wait for the perfect budget because we know that style has no budget. We know you can be stylish without spending a lot of money. And here's the really cool part. When you know your style, you'll find yourself spending less money and looking and feeling better. Because when you know your style, you aren't making those purchases that you later regret and just hang in your closet unworn. Instead, you invest in pieces that look good, that feel amazing, that feel like you. So that when you open your closet, you love everything in there. You know how to create a versatile wardrobe. You understand how to dress your unique body. You understand how to style an outfit. And so getting dressed every day becomes this joyful experience instead of something that you dread.

So we don't wait for the perfect budget. We know that by doing this work, we are going to save money and not to mention the opportunities that may open up because of how you're showing up in the world that could lead to more money. Whether it's a job promotion, whether it's getting more clients, whether it's an opportunity that you had no idea was even available to you until you showed up in the world in a way where that possibility was a possibility.

Are you all with me? This is why I'm so passionate about style you all because I can look back and see how style has been responsible for so many of the opportunities that I have been blessed with. Because had I shown up in a different energy, that possibility would not be available to me. I know that with every fiber of my being and now I have clients who have also said the same thing to me. Whether it's a date that they went on that then became their husband, a job promotion, them growing their businesses as a result of showing up in their authentic, fully expressed self.

That is the work that we do within The Style Experience. And so yeah, this experience is rolled out over the course of six months. We are going to have two 90-minute workshops every single month where we are going to build upon the curriculum. And if you cannot attend live, no worries because we always have replays that are in your beautiful membership area. But in addition to that, we are also going to have closet conversations. I'm going to be bringing you into my closet and it's like a show-and-tell. I'm going to be showing you how to style outfits. We are going to be talking about the obstacles that we all encounter on our style journeys and how to overcome them. This is going to be one big party that we have in my closet every single month via Zoom, and you are going to learn so much in these very curated closet conversations, as well as get to know the other women who are in the community.

And that leads me to the last point, the community. The friendships that were born from last year's Style Experience is probably my favorite part because when you do this work with like-minded women where you're celebrating, you're supporting, you're being vulnerable, you're sharing your pictures of the outfits that didn't work, and everyone still applauding you for the effort. When you are sharing the outfits that did work and everyone's applauding you about what is amazing about not only the outfit, but you. There is an energy that's created from that that is so beautiful and often creates lifelong bonds.

In The Style Experience, I'm going to encourage every single one of you to want what you want unapologetically. Whether that's sneakers or stilettos, whether it's leather or lace. This is about us supporting each other and our own authentic self-expression. And that's the kind of community I want to belong to. I want to belong amongst like-minded women who support each other, who aren't afraid of being vulnerable, who share in their struggles as well as their successes.

And that's what we're going to be doing, and we start on October the 3rd. It's just around the corner. The doors are open for a very limited time, and I would love to support you on your style journey. I was sharing in an Instagram video the other day a little bit about my own style journey and the twists and turns that have happened. But I said at the end, I'm like, you know, a style journey really is a journey back home to yourself, and you're going to make a lot of mistakes. Things aren't always going to go according to plan. You're going to get off track sometimes, but if you stay committed to your own self-discovery, you are going to so pleased with where you end up.

And I still feel like I'm on this journey because there's still so much more growth to do, and that's why I love The Style Experience because I'm growing right alongside you all. I am evolving. I'm shedding. I'm getting back every day, every month, every year to the essence of who I am. And again, I think it's a lifelong journey. But with the tools that we teach in The Style Experience, I do know this. You can speed up that journey. You can get there faster. You will have the tools to support you in getting dressed joyfully and being more confident in how you show up in your life and in the shopping choices that you make, the outfits that you put together.

Not only is it a life-changing journey, I think it's one of the most fun journeys that you will ever go on. So if you're ready to go on a style journey with me and an incredible group of women, come join us within The Style Experience. You can go to schoolofselfimage.com/style. We start on October the 3rd. I cannot wait to see you there. All right, my friends. Cheers to your style renaissance, whatever that looks like for you. It is definitely a renaissance of rebirth, of rejuvenation, of learning, of growth, and it's definitely one I encourage every single one of you to go on. Have a beautiful week and I'll see you on the next episode. Cheers.