On Friday, I bought my very first brand new car. I wrecked it 24 hours later. In fact, as I type this, it’s sitting in a secured yard in a mining town in Colorado, broken and injured. Why am I telling you this? Well, because it would be really easy to spin off into a painful story. It would be easy to sit and cry about it. It would be easy to think about how much it’s depreciated in value in less than a day. It would be easy to think about the “I shoulds” and “what ifs.” It would be easy to do nothing.
And, for a few hours, I did just this. I took the easy route. I let my mind run wild. And, it was painful.
However, I reminded myself of my core desire: to live with joie de vivre.
The term joie de vivre simply means an overall enjoyment of life and all that it has to offer – including heartbreaks, disappointments and failures. So, I chose to change my focus.
I chose to focus on my blessings of a home with food to eat.
I chose to focus on the image of me laughing about this little incident one day.
I chose to focus on all that is well in my life.
I chose to focus that a car is just a machine; people are not.
I chose to focus on the Divine protection that was around us.
I chose to focus on being part of a magnificent world that offers us events, people and circumstances to help us see the bigger picture.
I chose to French Kiss Life (and my broken new car).
One of the hardest things to do is to pick ourselves up when things seem to be going wrong.
I’ve learned that:
Mental laziness is easy.
Letting our minds run wild is easy.
Allowing excuses to rob us of our desires is easy.
Not taking action is easy.
After being brought home by a wonderful EMS volunteer (people are truly wonderful), I found myself in a strange place of wanting to choose easy, and sometimes, you must let yourself feel everything to finally say, “Enough!”
This morning, I decided to wake up, get dressed, have my coffee and do what I always do when I’m ready to get back on track: take massive action.
I called the insurance company.
I called the towing company.
I called my mother (she always knows what to say).
I wrote this blog post.
I put on lipstick.
I went for a 30 mile bike ride.
I cooked an amazing dinner with wine and jazz.
Taking action in life is powerful. It puts you back on track with your desires.
Then, I checked my e-mail and like serendipity always works, I found this message:
Dear Tonya,
It would have been really easy to say no to Le Voyage Paris.
I have all the excuses in the world: not enough time, money or resources.
I’ve been sitting around telling myself all the reasons why I shouldn’t and can’t go on this trip.
Suddenly, I realized that these same excuses keep showing up in my life over and over again, robbing me of the things I truly want in life and PARIS!
I decided to start focusing on why I could go. Out of nowhere, I started getting ideas on how to pay for the trip, how to find the time and how to make it happen.
I’m tired of just talking about what I want; I want to take action on my desires.
I’ve made the decision to go to Paris! It’s been a lifelong dream, and I’m not going to wait any longer.
I’ll see you in the City of Lights!
Love,
(A mon amie)
A Desire + An Action = Fabulous Living
One of the most courageous things you can do is not live a life of excuses but choose to live with intention and action towards what you want.
What are you desiring?
Is easy getting in the way?
Remember…
Excuses are easy.
Mediocrity is easy.
Inaction is easy.
Ignoring your desires is easy.
Creating the life you desire isn’t always easy, but do you want easy or fabulous?
What’s one action you’re willing to take today towards your desires? Please share in the comments below.
If you want to experience what it means to live a fabulous life, then I challenge you to join me for The French Kiss the World Society.
During The French Kiss the World Society, I am going to teach you how to harness your feminine power and live with joie de vivre through style, food and wine, adventure and mind play.
I’ll show you how to turn everyday challenges into opportunities for growth and joy.
I’ll show you how to wake up each morning and live with intention to create what you desire.
I’ll show you how to create your own personal style and show up in the world as the most incredible, authentic you.
I’ll show you how to truly love food and your amazing body.
I’ll show you how to French Kiss Life, for real!
If you’re tired of easy and desire fabulous, click here to get all the details on how to join me for Le Voyage Paris.
I can’t wait to French Kiss Life with you in my favorite city in the world.
Cheers to Not Choosing Easy,
Tonya
Self-Image Makeover
Live Your Life With Style, Flare, and Elegance
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Kickass blog post Tonya Leigh! Loved every morsel of it!
Aaawwww...thanks Lisa!
Hi Tonya - once again, I am blown away by your powerful message! I'm super bummed for you that your car is wrecked, but I am so happy for you for finding the strength to see the beauty in it! It is very easy to let the little (or the big) things get us down in life, but I find that remembering how lucky we are is the best medicine when self pity strikes. We are so so fortunute to be happy, healthy, beautiful and intelligent women who live in place where we are free. You are truly an inspiration, I admire your ability to be so gracious and to choose to focus on the beauty in life!
Hi Rose,
Thank you SO much for your kind words. Focusing on all our blessings is one of the most powerful ways to turn a "bad" day around. Action is the next best thing.
xoxo,
Tonya
Love this post.
As I crouched over a campfire this weekend, surrounded by a bunch of kids, making donuts from scratch in a huge cast iron skillet. One of the kids said - "Aunt Katy, this is awfully piddly, isn't it? Why don't we just go to the store and buy donuts?"
I pushed my cowboy hat back, sat back on my heels and looked her in the eye. "Because that is just too easy. And these are going to taste way better because we all made them together, over a fire, outside, in one of our favorite places on earth."
And you know what - they were delicious. And worth every extra minute of effort, laughter and intrigue that went into them.
A year ago - I would have gotten in the car and bought them. A year ago - I would have taken the easy way out. A year ago - I would have thought about how much fun it would be to do this - but then would have dismissed it because of the "work" involved, or the idea that other people would be annoyed by my wanting to do it. (I know, what an odd obstacle I made for myself).
But this year - I'm living deliberately. And it is a lot more fun. Thanks for being a constant inspiration.
Love this Katy!
Diamond wisdom as always, love! J'adore this lesson.
Thank you for bringing it back to the practicality of joie de vivre!
xo
Nisha
Fantastic post Tonya! Today, I'm going to make something amazing happen in the area of marketing my book and I'm going to create one new paying client! Thanks for the question.
Great post. When things go wrong I'm a fan of massive action too. It always makes me feel so much better. I feel capable, confident and in control of my life. Thanks for sharing this story 🙂
Excellent post, Tonya. I love how you turned disappointment, anger and fear into fired up focus and action. Easier said than done most of the time but this is the perfect reminder that we can get brilliant things done if we don't let a setback overwhelm us. Thanks so much for this post - I needed it today 🙂
This is great! This is exactly what I call a lifestyle of 'living with joy', finding ways to make each moment better and letting go of things that don't make us feel so good. I am so impressed that you took an incident that would have seriously caused people ridiculous amounts of stress and anger and were able to turn it around, make it better for yourself, and then share your insights with the world! Love it!