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It’s so easy to get caught up in indecision or to make the ‘safe’ choice. What I know is that either of the two will most likely not lead to a fabulous life, because both are fear based. Just yesterday, I had an opportunity come my way that I immediately thought, “I’m definitely not ready for that one.”

Before even considering that this may be a huge step in the right direction, fear wanted me to say no.

But, more than anything, I want to nurture my self-image – expand the possibilities, fall in love over and over, push up against self-imposed boundaries and see what I’m capable of in this lifetime.

I asked myself the question that has helped me gain instant clarity in moments where I wanted to pretend I didn’t know, run from a choice and shrink from my soul.

Here it is:  What would my 90-year old self tell me to do? (tweet it!)

Now, let’s get this one straight.  I’m not speaking of your feared 90-year old bag lady. I’m speaking of that spectacular woman that has rocked out her life and has dished out so much love, creativity, and inspiration that she looks back on her life and says, “Well done, darling.”

She’s that woman who gave it all she had.

In fact, this clip of Ilona Royce Smithkin is how I envision myself at that beautiful age – a wild, beautiful freedom from living a life completely as my own.

Your 90-year old self has the answers. She is not wishy-washy.  It’s either an “absolutely YES,” or a “not a chance.”

And, she can guide you from the big to little questions, such as:

Should I want to quit?

The red or purple dress?

Should I go to the event?

What should I write about?

Should I book that ticket to Paris?

It’s a simple question, but one that can help you gain instant clarity around your decisions.  And, don’t be surprised when what she has to say scares the daylights out of you.

But, if we want our 90-year old selves to be toasting our lives with a “Well done, darling,” it’s time we listen to what she has to say, don’t you think?

To get you started, I’d love for you to describe your 90-year old self in the comments below.  I can’t wait to meet her!  I’m sure she’s fabulous, wise and ready to live a most beautiful life!

Passionately Yours,


The Self-Image Manifesto

You’re Invited To Live An Extraordinary Life!