

tonya's diary
what i'm thinking about
Happy Thanksgiving - from me and my family to you and yours.
(And if you’re not in the U.S. or don’t celebrate this particular holiday, just know how grateful I am for you, too.)
Welcome to The Grateful Issue of The Edit.
As you’re reading this, I’m in Scottsdale celebrating Thanksgiving with my family and dearest friends.
As cliché as it sounds, my heart is overflowing with gratitude for life.
Often, we can get into a habit of wanting MORE -
more money
more things
more experiences
more clients
more, more, MORE…
And we forget to appreciate everything and everyone we already have.
For example, as excited as I am to grow School of Self-Image and expand our membership, I never want to take for granted the amazing members that I have right now.
So, this is for all my ladies inside School of Self-Image:
I appreciate you all deeply.
Almost every day, I peek into our private group and read through your challenges and celebrations.
Every day, I think about how I can serve you all better.
Every day, I hold the vision for you to step into your most extraordinary life — all while knowing that who you are right now, in this moment, is ENOUGH.
My role as your coach is to help you release whatever blocks you from seeing yourself as anything less than extraordinary.
Thank you for trusting me to guide you on this journey. It’s an honor to witness your becoming, as many of you have witnessed my own.
I cannot wait for what 2023 holds for us.
So grateful for you,

P.S. Since the holidays sneak up on us so quickly, I couldn’t wait to tell you about my Red Hot Holiday Party coming up on Dec 4, 2022.

At this party, we’ll be reimagining the holiday season and making it your happiest, HEALTHIEST holiday ever.
Two things inspired this:
- Many of us use the holiday season to throw our health out the window. This puts you behind the 8-ball come January. Instead, why can’t we be women who can have it all? Why can’t we have plenty of fun during the holidays AND come out even healthier than we started? This holiday party will show you how.
- The holidays are fraught with opportunities to stress yourself out and put yourself last. What if this year were different? What if this year you prioritized your happiness? Let’s decide it’s possible and create it together.

The Thought Edit
A New Thought to Restyle Your Mind
Give Yourself Some Grace & Want What You Have
I find that during this season of giving thanks, we’re taught to just “be grateful”...
But what about when our crazy brains are not grateful?
Sometimes, this creates layers of guilt and resistance which only makes things worse. In this week’s podcast episode, I’m sharing the power of:
Wanting What You Have
I hope this podcast gives you grace this holiday season.


SOPHISTICATES
Ideas for Elevating from Our Members
Honoring My Brother
with Holly Ecimovic
“Hi SOSI friends! I’m proud to say I used the scheduling methods Tonya suggests, as well as applying concepts from the Dream Atelier, to bring to fruition a goal I’ve recently had - publish another book and sell it - to honor my younger brother who died in 2016.
I faced a LOT of resistance when showing up for each tiny step in the process, and honestly, I had to face a LOT of mess from my brain: ‘Nobody cares about your book. This might be a waste of time. Writing this book is making me more sad and missing my brother. Why am I doing this to myself? This is not related to your full-time job.’
Well, I managed my brain and pushed through! I’m not going to lie, a lot of tears and bad feelings came up [but] I pushed through the tears of resistance and I hit my goal!
The moral of the story is…never give up!! And push through, despite what might be painful. Think of what’s on the other side of the pain. Remind yourself that adversity and resistance are ALL part of it when you accomplish a goal!”


A Taste of Style
Making the Everyday Extraordinary
I call it “giving things away with gratitude.”
Sometimes, we might think “If I feel grateful for something, that means I need to hold onto it.”
Or conversely, “If I move on from something, it means I’m not grateful.”
Marie shows us this isn’t true. In her book The Lifechanging Magic of Tidying Up, Marie shares a step in the tidying process called “Discarding” where you give each item that you no longer want to keep a “proper send-off”, offering gratitude to that item for what it brought to your life and then, saying goodbye to it.
Marie says this step helps you “face your past and create your future.” Isn’t that beautiful?
This philosophy has offered me a lot of freedom, as I evolve my self-image and let go of things and people along the way who can’t continue with me on the journey. If it’s time for you to do some letting go too, give it all away with gratitude.

HAUTE HABITS
Habits for Creating the Impossible
Dress for Success is a global not-for-profit organization that empowers women to achieve economic independence by providing a network of support, professional attire and the development tools to help women thrive in work and in life.
Since starting operations in 1997, Dress for Success has expanded to 143 cities in 23 countries and has helped more than 1.3 million women work towards self-sufficiency.
If you have professional women’s clothing that you plan to discard but that is still in good condition, consider donating them to a local affiliate chapter in your area.
Just go to their website and enter your location in the top left corner under “Find Your Local Affiliate”.

In the Bag
Tools for REinvention
But there are many ways of reducing the workload and making the event about connection, rather than your ability to outdo Martha Stewart.
Consider these categories and choose one or two to focus on. Then, make the rest as easy as possible.
*Special note for my SOSI ladies: There’s a helpful masterclass inside School of Self-Image called “How to Be an Extraordinary Hostess”. Review that for a step-by-step walkthrough on making your next event magical.

The Toast
Your Invitation to Connect & Celebrate
And don’t forget to join me for the first holiday party on your calendar this season!


// TheEDIT
A weekly digital magazine by the School of Self-Image
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