tonya's diary

what i'm thinking about

I’m back from my 2-week European adventure! SO FUN. No work (except for a few fun social posts) and tons of time with you-know-who.?

But I couldn’t wait to get back into my office to be with you, and that got me thinking…

Occasionally, someone will say to me, “Tonya, if I could do what you do for work, I’d be so happy.”

What they don’t know is that…

… every once in a while, I fantasize about quitting work and running away to a deserted island.?

This happens when I haven’t been managing my mind, and I’ve been in hustle mode for far too long.

I think we all want to:

Build a life you don’t want to run away from

The truth is I love working.

I’ve been working since I was eight years old.

I could not wait to get a “real job” when I was fifteen years old - at Hardee’s. #hautebeginnings ?

What makes it so easy for me to love working? I have extraordinary work habits - and that’s what this issue of The Edit is all about.

I’m calling it The Runaway Issue because we’re running far away from ordinary - and building a work-life we couldn’t live without.

P.S. Extraordinary Work Habits is also exactly what I’ll be teaching this month inside the School of Self-Image. Did you notice that the doors are open for just a few days? Jump in before we close, my little runaway.

The Thought Edit

A New Thought to Restyle Your Mind

The Secret to Loving Work is to Leisurely Hustle

Leisurely Hustling is the practice of balancing ambition and ease.

Making time for pleasure, play, and delight is more than a mindset. It’s a way of life.

After all, you were not born to just go to work and pay bills, my dear. My definition of leisurely hustling is:

✨Being ultra-focused when I’m focused

✨Taking lots of breaks

✨Always having something fun on my calendar

✨Building in time for self-care

To create your own style of leisurely hustling, listen to a vintage classic from the podcast vault: one of my all-time favorite episodes, How to Leisurely Hustle.


Ideas for Elevating from Our Members

Designing an Office Space that Inspires You
with Lakeitha Flagg-Duncan

“I loved my old office space but April’s theme of Enhancing Your Environment inspired me to shake things up a bit.

I wanted a different feel. Something fresh.

I was inspired by the Ryder Hotel in Charleston for the color scheme and mood. Now, I’m inspired in here.

This is one of the reasons I love School of Self-Image. As a coach, I’m always inspiring others, and sometimes, you just need someone who inspires you.”

Check out Lakeitha’s stunning office makeover.

A Taste of Style

Making the Everyday Extraordinary

Nothing inspires me more than having a plan for my work that I love - and I manage it all on Google Calendar.

However, I think the standard Google Calendar design leaves a little something to be desired.

Here are my top 2 tips for upgrading your Google Calendar aesthetic:

  • Customize the colors on your calendar. Use the tool to choose a pleasing color palette and then download the Google Chrome extension “More Colors for Calendar” to install.
  • Choose a custom background color or photo for your calendar. I love the marble look but you can choose anything!

Here’s the cutest video on how to do this. Start at about 2:46 for the Google Calendar tips.


Habits for Creating the Impossible

Use Your Calendar to Sashay Towards Your Future

The fastest way to create a life you want to run away from is to fill your calendar with things you don’t want to do. (Think: People pleasing, overcommitting, “shoulds”, and busywork.) I want you to create your calendar on purpose.

This week’s haute habit is to schedule in activities that reflect the future you.

⭐️Does she visit museums? Schedule that in.
⭐️Does she spend more time with her friends? Schedule that in.
⭐️Does she wake up early and journal? Schedule it!

When you look at your calendar, be sure it reflects the woman you’re becoming.

*Special Note for my SOSI Ladies: If you’re in School of Self-Image, the Daily 3 is the antidote to this. By following the Daily 3, you are thinking thoughts and taking action based on who you’re becoming, not just who you’ve been.

In the Bag

Tools for REinvention

In the Bag is the section of The Edit that gives you tools to reinvent yourself and create the life you want.

The ultimate tool for reinventing yourself is:

A Membership in the School of Self-Image

The School of Self-Image is where women go to learn how to become extraordinary.

Thousands of women are creating their after-stories right now, and they are incredible.

  • Reaching goals
  • Leaving spouses
  • Falling in love
  • Taking trips
  • Redecorating
  • Changing careers
  • Growing businesses
  • Revamping routines
  • Creating beauty
  • Finding their tribe
  • Reaching goals
  • Leaving spouses
  • Falling in love
  • Taking trips
  • Redecorating
  • Changing careers
  • Growing businesses
  • Revamping routines
  • Creating beauty
  • Finding their tribe

What’s the real magic within the School of Self-Image? It’s three-fold.

One //
 A simple way to become the woman you want to be. We’re changing how you think and more importantly, how you see yourself, so you can bring forth the best parts of you.

Two //
 A deep focus each month on an area of life that you want to elevate and expand.

In the past, we’ve covered over 50 areas, including:

When you join School of Self-Image this month, you’ll have immediate access to all 50+ of these classes.

Did you know that the doors to the School of Self-Image are open for a few days right now?

Three // You surround yourself with a true sisterhood of like-minded women who are doing extraordinary things.

I can’t emphasize how important this is. If you’ve been the kind of woman who’s never really had that close-knit group of women who lift you up in a spirit of community over competition, you have got to come join this membership.

When you join School of Self-Image, you immediately get 3,000+ sisters who will support you, inspire you, and cheer you on to the life of your dreams.

Here are a few important reasons to join now:

1. Our deep focus for August is going to be “Extraordinary Work Habits.”

For a lot of women I meet, work is stressful. It’s boring. It’s lacking inspiration, and they don’t know how to create a career they love.

For others, they’re super ambitious but they can’t seem to find that balance. They’re stressed out and lacking self-care.

For others, they love what they do but they don’t enjoy where they work, and they’re ready for a change.

If any of these describe you, this is the perfect month to join.

2. The $200 initiation fee
is waived between now and August 1.

That’s two months free. We want to encourage you to take advantage of these savings while doors are open.

3. You’ll make yourself proud.

If you’ve set goals that you haven’t been able to achieve, this is the missing piece. You haven’t had a self-image that matched those goals.

This is about harnessing the power of the single most important truth I’ve ever learned:

You’re not limited by your family, your past, or even who you think you are. You get to create yourself.

And when you do, you’ll be so proud of yourself. Isn’t that exciting?

What is School of Self-Image?

It’s a monthly membership, designed to help you become the most extraordinary version of you. You learn to manage your mind, set goals you achieve, and design your entire life on purpose – from your relationships, to your habits, to your style, to your environment.

It’s the ultimate community of women going places. Plus, it’s affordable, and you can cancel any time (but we’re pretty confident you’ll fall head over heels.)

Let’s go, Sister. Don’t run away. Run toward the life you’re really after.

The Toast

Your Invitation to Connect & Celebrate

Surround Yourself with People You Don’t Want to Runaway From

I always say that I’m too old to hang around people I don’t enjoy. (That’s a little joke for you.)

While I’m not too old, I choose to spend the majority of my time with people who inspire me, support me, and motivate me to be my best.

Once in a while, when I get around someone who triggers negative thoughts, I have the tools to manage my mind …

… But in general? I want to be with the ones who love me and want to make magic with me.

That’s you. Thank you for being here.

// TheEDIT

A weekly digital magazine by the School of Self-Image