I spent most of my early adulthood taking action for one purpose: to achieve a goal.

Now, don’t get me wrong, Tiffany, I love a good goal. 

In fact, I encourage every single woman within the School of Self-Image to choose an Extraordinary Goal for the year. 

Goals grow us. 
Goals guide us.
Goals focus us…

… but if you’re always moving forward with a goal in mind, you can start to fixate on how big the goal is and you haven’t gotten there yet - and, we all know how discouraging THAT can feel.

For this reason, I love to have another practice entirely - one that focuses beyond the goal. 

I focus on who I want to become - and it feels like a new kind of freedom.

What kind of woman do you want to become?Is she Slim? Adventurous? Stylish? In this edition of The Edit, The Becoming Issue, let’s put our goals on the backburner for just a moment —

and focus on the extraordinary woman you’re becoming.


A Practice In Becoming


Here’s a beautiful little embodiment challenge for you, Tiffany. Don’t let its simplicity fool you. This is so powerful.

First, pick a quality you admire in other women that you’d love to be more of yourself. An example might be ‘elegant’ or ‘courageous’ or ‘fashionable.’

Now, ask yourself, “How can I embody that word today?” Be playful and allow your imagination to come up with new possibilities. Tell me over on Instagram @Tonyaleigh what you came up with. 


Becoming Luxury

with Rita Delgadillo

“One of my ultimate pleasures is going to the movies, by myself, in the middle of the day.

I went to this marvelous movie yesterday afternoon. It is a remake of a Kurosawa movie I love, which is written by the Nobel Prize-winning author Kazuo Ishiguro.

This is luxury to me. Immersing myself in the masters of art and their creative works. The cool thing about this luxury is how affordable it can be. Tickets to matinée movies, art museums, and concerts are all reasonably priced.

To me, being able to stand in front of a great painting and examine it, or read a line in a book that takes my breath away, or close my eyes and listen to Moonlight Sonata, fills me with such gratitude. 

Gratitude that they were created and gratitude that I am fortunate enough to experience all these works of art in all their forms.”


Evoking a Desired State of Being


My recent focus has been on becoming a woman who lives with joyful ease. So, one daily action I’ve been taking is listening to music that evokes that state of being.

Here’s a playlist that gets me there every time.  

Be Actions vs. Outcome Actions


An outcome action is centered around a specific goal. To lose a certain amount of weight, for instance. Or to run a marathon.

A be action, on the other hand, is focused on becoming a certain kind of person. Wealthy, confident, magnetic.

In this episode, we explore the difference between the two kinds of actions and how best to apply them to your own life. Don’t miss this episode. 


// TheEDIT

A weekly digital magazine by the School of Self-Image