In last week's episode, we talked about choosing your word of the year. In today's episode, part two, we're going to talk about how to embody your word of the year because who you are being is attracting everything in your life.
Bonjour, and welcome to the French Kiss Life podcast, where personal development meets style. I'm Tonya Leigh, Certified Master Life Coach and the hostess of this party, where we explore how to live artfully and well. Each week, I'll be sharing inspiring stories, practical tips, and timeless wisdom on how to elevate the quality of your everyday, and celebrate along the way. Let's dive into today's episode.
Hello, my friends. Happy first week of January, the first week of 2020. So exciting. I think there's no better way to start a year than by committing to French Kissing Life. And I don't know if you heard, but I'm actually hosting a mini workshop. And I love the title. It's called, "A Three-Part Cocktail To Your Best Year Ever." How brilliant is that title? I'm going to be sharing the three ingredients to truly blow your own mind this year. Because you all know my word of the year if you listened to last week's episode, is to be amazed. And I want us all to be amazed this year. I want us to be amazed with what we're capable of. I want us to be amazed with how we've grown and evolved over the year. I want us to be amazed with life.
Now, this mini workshop started on Monday and this podcast is coming out on a Wednesday, but if you're on my list, you are probably already participating in it, but if you're not, it's not too late. You can head over to frenchkisslife.com/cocktail so I can serve you up the best cocktail ever, because I am known for my great cocktails.
It is time for a community spotlight. This is the part of the show where I get to highlight someone in the community who has benefited from the French Kiss Lifestyle. And today's spotlight is on Brittany. She is a student of the Dream Atelier. And here's what Brittany had to say.
"Tanya, I've read many productivity books and I've taken classes on goal setting, but I always seem to struggle with the concepts. I knew something was missing, but I didn't know what. I started to believe that the problem was me. Then, I started following you right before you opened the doors to the Dream Atelier. At first, I was hesitant to join, thinking that this was just going to be another program where I was going to fail once again. But something inside of me told me to just do it. I'm so glad I did. You filled in the missing pieces and hearing you go through your own dream making process with examples, plus the challenges you face, was so helpful.
"I use your calendar system every day and it's been a game changer. But what's even more miraculous is that I don't give up on myself and self-sabotage like I used to. The Dream Atelier really addressed the internal struggles that I've had around productivity. Six months after the Dream Atelier, I'm still using the framework you taught me and I already know that this is the year I will achieve my goals. There's simply no doubt in my mind. To be someone who no longer gives up on herself is the best gift I've ever given myself. So thank you Tonya for that gift." You are so welcome, Brittany. But I have to say you need to thank yourself. You are the one that's creating these results in your life.
And I tell clients this all of the time. They want to give me the credit but I'm like, no. There are people that take my programs and don't really implement them. But then there are those of you who do, and you all are the ones that are creating the results and so, high five to you for taking the framework, taking what I teach within the Dream Atelier and using it to amaze yourself. So listen, if you want to amaze yourself this year, we are starting the Dream Atelier next week. We are shipping out the workbooks as you're listening to this.
So come on, join us. It's an incredible program. And I love the program because I actually get to show you what I'm working on, and how I plan, and how I execute, and how I don't let my brain stop me. How I keep going, which is how I made 2019 my best year ever, and I know 2020 is going to be even more amazing. And it's all within what I teach within the Dream Atelier. So head over to The Dream Atelier, and that's a-t-e-l-i-e-r, dot com. Come join us.
Welcome to this two-part series on choosing and living out your word of the year. Now this is part two, which means if you just happen to stumble upon this episode and you haven't listened to the previous one, you may feel a little bit lost. So I highly recommend that you go back to episode 162. You can go to frenchkisslife.com/162 to find that episode, because in this one we're talking about how to take that word and bring it to life. This is all about embodying your word of the year. Because you can't just put it on a vision board and hope that it's going to work. This isn't something that you just choose and then you forget about and then expect your year to be different. You need to participate in the party. You need to embody and live out your word because whatever you practice embodying, you will begin to see reflected in your reality.
So what does it mean to embody something? The definition of embody is to give a tangible, bodily or concrete form to an abstract concept, or to be an example of, or express an idea, principle, et cetera, an action. So thinking about your word, you want to practice this year being an example of it, expressing it and putting it into action on a daily basis. So for this one, just like in the last one, you may want a journal and a pen to really take some notes and to go deeper into this process.
So the first thing I want you to think about is, why did you choose this word? Why is it important to you? And all of my work with my clients, I've seen a direct correlation and a big why and the results that they create. Because if you don't understand why it's important, the chances are you're not going to show up for it.
You're going to forget it. You will not be committed to it. So you need to make your why very compelling. You need to make your why so intoxicating to you that you just have to drink it. Now I'm going to lead you through a visualization exercise with some questions that I want you to answer. So I want you to fast forward to the end of 2020 and imagine that you are celebrating your best year ever. And I want you to think about your word of the year.
And I want you to ask yourself these questions. What changed in your life because you embodied this word? So maybe for you, your word of the year is abundance. And looking back on your year, you have created more wealth for yourself. You've become more relaxed around money. You are feeling so grateful and so blessed. So what has changed in your life because you've embodied this word?
I also want you to ask yourself, what have you attracted more of into your life by embodying this word? So maybe for you, your word of the year is love. You want to be more loving, you want to be open to more love. So by embodying that, what did you attract of into your life? Maybe better relationships. Maybe new friendships. Maybe you attracted your partner. But just allow yourself to imagine what you have attracted into your life by embodying the word. These questions are all designed to really help you be future focused and to really see how this word is going to impact your life. Because when you can see it and feel it, then it's just a matter of showing up for it. Okay? I also want you to ask yourself, how did this word grow you over the past year? Because again, if it's a word that is scary and exciting, it is going to grow you.
So how do you imagine that that has happened over the last year? This is a really good one. What did you need to give up to embody your word of the year? So let's say for example that your word of the year is confidence. What did you have to give up in order to embody confidence? I imagine maybe you had to give up the constant self-doubt and the constant negative self-talk. That's just one example. Let's say your word of the year is, we'll go back to the one that I've already used, abundance. What did you have to give up? You probably had to give up thinking scarce thoughts. You probably had to give up overspending. What did you have to give up to live more abundantly? Now we're going to go even deeper into this because what you are embodying is based off of your thoughts and your beliefs.
So for example, if you believe, "I am lovable," you're going to walk through life in a very different way versus, "I am unlovable." So at the core of embodying your word of the year is going to be to examine your thoughts and your beliefs that you currently have that aren't a match for this word. So when you fast forward to the end of 2020 and you look at how your beliefs have changed, what do you believe at the end of the year that you don't currently believe?
So we'll use my word for an example for this one. So my word of the year is amazed. And when I looked up the synonyms for amazed, one of them is to blow my own mind. And so when I think to the end of the year, end of 2020, and a woman who's blown her own mind, that means I'm going to have to think in ways I've never thought. Fill in ways I've not been feeling on a regular basis and do things that I'm not currently doing, right?
And when I think what she's thinking and believing versus me, there's a little doubt. Currently, I have doubt around some of my goals for this year, which is totally normal. It's normal to have doubt around things you haven't yet created. But when I fast forward to the end of 2020, she knows it's possible because she's already done it, right? She is like, "Girl, you've got this. You're going to do this. This is possible for you." And so those are the beliefs that I don't currently have that I'm going to have to practice believing, in order to embody my word of the year, which is amazed. And so just know this is normal, that you currently have beliefs that aren't serving your word of the year. And that is the work this year, is to practice believing new things so that you can feel new ways so that you can embody your word of the year.
So think about what beliefs does she have that you don't currently have and write those down. And then I want you to ask yourself questions like, "How does she carry herself when she's embodying this word?" So again, let's go back to the word confidence. I want you to imagine the confident you at the end of 2020, and how do you hold yourself in a room full of people? How do you talk with others? How do you walk through a room? And I want you to really notice the difference between that version of you and the version of you now. How does she speak? What does she wear? Right? When I think about the version of me who's amazed, I'm also amazed by how my style has evolved over the year. And so even think about how she dresses and how that may be different from how you're currently dressing.
I want you to ask yourself, what are her daily habits when she's embodying this word? What is she doing that you're not currently doing? I also want you to ask yourself, how she treats herself and cares for herself, and just notice the difference between her and the you of today. And then finally, I want you, again, to fast forward to the end of 2020 and ask yourself, "What three goals did I accomplish this year based on my word of the year?" So when I think about what it's going to take to amaze me this year, I have three goals that, right now, I am having some doubt around. I'm wondering, can I do this? But when I think about the 2021 version of Tonya that's already done it, I'm amazed. I'm like, "Wow, you really did it."
And so for this year, I will have completed my book, which is happening. I am in the process of writing it right now, but not just complete it. I want to be amazed by it. I want to feel so good about it. I want to look at that book and be like, "Wow sister, look at what you did." And so by getting into the energy of being amazed, I know it's going to impact my writing. I know it's going to impact how I feel about the book. I will create a book that I'm amazed with. So that's number one. Number two is I am going to host a different kind of in-person event this year. And I know at the end I am going to be amazed and the women who attend will be amazed as well. Because again, it's not just me being amazed. I want the people around me to get into the energy of just being amazed with themselves and amazed with their life.
I want to create that energy, right? And so, when I think about this in-person event, what am I going to need to think and embody in order to create this event that I'm just completely amazed with, and so is every woman in that room. My third goal for this year is feeding my big dream, which I talked about last year, which is I want French Kiss Life and what we stand for to reach a million women in the next four years. It was five, now it's four. And so, this year I would be so amazed if we doubled the community. Now again, I don't know how that's going to happen and I don't need to worry about the how. I just need to embody the woman who's amazed that she has done it. And then trust that the steps will refill themselves and to trust that it is happening.
I just need to show up for the party and do my part and then let the universe take care of the rest. And so, when I think about my word of the year, these three things would amaze me at the end of 2020. So those are going to be my top three goals. And then I do have a personal goal that I'm throwing in. And this is always a goal for me. It's crazy. But I know that in order to do all of these things, I'm going to have to take exquisite care of myself. And so every year I'm wanting to up my own health. I'm wanting to become more full of vitality, healthier than I've ever been. And so at the end of 2020 I will look back and say, "Wow. You got healthier this year. You're the healthiest you've ever been." That would feel amazing to me.
So again, I want you to go to the end of the year and visualize yourself having embodied this word for an entire year. You've practiced it. You've practiced it so much that you've become it. And here's the thing you all have to understand. Part of the practice is failure, part of the practice is falling down and getting back up. And this is where you all stop yourselves. You're like, "Well, I just thought a scarce thought. Guess I'm not going to be abundant this year." And then you just give up. Not realizing that is part of the process. But when you go to the woman who is finally in that state and that energy of abundance, she didn't get there by giving up the first time she thought thoughts of lack. She recognized it and realize, "Oh, that's part of the old me. That is not the new me that I'm becoming. That is not what I'm practicing. Let me recommit."
Part of this whole process is being kind to yourself, extending yourself grace and recommitting over and over and over again until you've practiced it so much that you've become it. And as a result, now you have evidence for it in your outer world. That is the process of embodying. That is the process of becoming. When I think back to the years that I kept recommitting to my word, what I can tell you is that by the end of the year I was embodying that word. It was very easy. But there were a lot of failures along the way. For example, the year I picked committed. As someone who had given up on herself over and over and over again. It's not like I just picked that word on January 1st and all of a sudden, oh, I'm committed. No, there were days in that year where I didn't commit.
There were days in that year where I didn't show up for what I said I was going to do. But I didn't beat myself up over it. I really started to understand this is part of the process. You've got to keep practicing it. And as I practiced it, I eventually became a woman that when I commit to something, I commit. I follow through. I show up for myself. But again, there were a lot of missteps and a lot of days where I didn't commit in that process. And I share that with you because I don't want you to give up on your word of the year. I don't want you to beat yourself up. That's not the purpose of this.
The purpose of this is to grow you, and you don't grow while simultaneously beating yourself up. And so just commit to practicing your word of the year. Look at the answers that you have written down based on the questions that I just asked and begin to incorporate those answers and to your everyday life. And I promise you that when you do, you will amaze yourself this year. You will blow your own mind with what you are capable of.
It is time for J'adore. This is the part of the show where I get to share something that I love with you. And in last week's J'adore, I talked about the pen that I love to use to journal with. And in case you missed that, you can head to frenchkisslife.com/pens with an s. But today I'm going to share with you one of my notebooks that I use every day. So I typically have three notebooks at all times. I have a notebook that I journal my dreams and I do a lot of future focus journaling. I have a smaller notebook that I keep with me where, when I get ideas, I can just jot them down because if I don't write them down, I most likely forget them. And then I have a notebook that I do a lot of my business planning in and that's typically the one that I keep on my desk at all times.
And I love beautiful notebooks and journals to write in. Because again, I love making everything as beautiful as possible. And so along with the pen that I shared in my Instagram story that everyone was obsessed with, people were asking, where did you get the notebook? Wow, I've got you sister.
You can head over to frenchkisslife.com/notebook to see the notebook that I use every single day. It's my companion, it's on my desk. I'm always writing in it. I go through so many in a year, but it's got on the very front of it, it's really pretty, it's got flowers and it's in these beautiful shades of mauve and pinks, and it has, "Live in the Moment," written on the front. So head over to frenchkisslife.com/notebook to see the one that I use. Have a great week everyone. I look forward to seeing you in next week's episode.
If you enjoyed this episode and you want to dive even deeper into the French Kiss Lifestyle, let’s start with a makeover; a mindset makeover. You can download my free training, The 3 Mindset Makeovers Every Woman Needs, by visiting www.FrenchKissLife.com/mindset – because after all, mindset is the new black.